The Hellsings go to Hogwarts
by Marieko
Summary: Kinda Sequel to Violence, Booze and too much family, though it can stand alone. What happens when Bunny, Sets' and Raye gets sucked into the Harry Potter realm, where none of my fictives make it out alive? Hell if i know...
1. Neechee

Author: PRESENTING THE HELLSINGS GO TO HOGWARTS!! Oh yeah… I went there.

Setsuna: why??? WHY ME DAMNIT??

Author: cause I was flipping through channels and saw a little thing on the new Harry Potter movie and these kids were making blue animals made of smoke from their wands and there was this one chick who made a bunny appear and I was all like "What would happen if Bunny did that? Would she make a bunny? Well let's find out!!" so here I am.

Raye: that was mostly one sentence.

Author: so?

Raye: I don't know. I just thought that was cool.

It was a nice fall day in England. It was cool, but not cold. The sun was shining but it didn't try and fry poor innocent humans to death. Hogwarts was busy trying to get ready for students to arrive. They wouldn't be there of course until nightfall, making an air of anticipation fall on the school. The feeling didn't quite reach the Forbidden Forest, as the forest animals didn't really care a flip about witches and wizards.

All of the sudden a bit of air separated itself from the rest of space as a portal opened. Out fell three teenage girls, soon followed by three suitcases, various books, three cauldrons, boxes, backpacks, four cats and three sealed letters.

"Owie!" The pile of crap started moving.

"Get off of me!!" Someone, or many someones started shoving stuff off of them.

"What the fuck is going on??" Bunny yelled, trying to separate herself from the pile but failing miserably as she could only get one arm and her head out.

"How the hell should I know?" Setsuna retorted, shaking a cat off of her leg. This was kind of hard to do, seeing as she was wearing a leather skirt and worn black hooker boots. Purple fishnet stockings with multiple runs crawled up her legs. They matched the colour of her worn velvet halter top, that was now barely velvet as most of it had been rubbed off. Her blue and silver hair was messily pulled into a pony tail, leaving her blue eyes free of stray hairs. Earrings traveled up her ears, but other than that she was free of jewelry.

"What is all this stuff?" Raye asked, picking up a cauldron. Her red plaid skirt looked as if it had seen better days, being a little torn around the edges. Ripped fishnet stockings found their way down her legs, meeting with scuffed motorcycle boots. Her t-shirt was a System of a Down shirt that was in no way new. It even had a burn mark on the side. Her dark blue hair was down, left free to fall to just past her shoulders. Her blue eyes looked thoughtful while the silver slit in her right eye flashed.

"Again, how the hell should I know?" Setsuna asked, putting her hands on her hips. All three of the sisters had multiple scratches on them, although whether that was from the fall or from other things, no one could tell. They looked tired and frustrated beyond measure. "Where are we?" she said looking around.

"In a forest. Duh." Raye said, shoving the books into a cauldron. She helped her eldest sister to her feet, then went on to trying to organize the pile into something more manageable.

Setsuna glared at her younger sister "I knew that. I mean what dimension. Who has the DPS?"

"I do." Bunny said, digging in the pocket of her baggy jeans. They had multiple rips on them, and they barely hid bad-ass steel toed boots. Her shirt was red and said "The rabid clowns are right behind you", and it looked like they had got a hold of her, as the shirt was torn in many places. Her bluish silver hair was cut choppy and short around her face as bangs hung in her grey eyes.

Those eyes were currently looking at the device she found in her pocket. It was black and plastic. It flipped open to reveal a keyboard and a screen. She pressed the on button then typed something into it. After a second numbers appeared on the screen. After a second she said "We are in dimension 212."

Setsuna pulled a folded paper out of her boot. She unfolded it, which made it bigger than she was. She turned it around, so she could read the list of numbers and words, as apposed to the map on the other side. She pulled on a chain that went around her neck and into her shirt. Attached to it was a little magnifying glass. She examined the map through the glass, trying to find the right number. "212... There it is! We are in the dimension of…oh shit." She went pale.

"What?" Raye asked.

"Harry Potter…"

"Cool!" Raye said.

"Not cool. English people annoy me." Bunny said.

"Everybody annoys you." Raye corrected.

Bunny just shrugged.

Setsuna sat on an upturned caldron and grabbed a black cat, stroking it nervously. "Why, of all the dimensions, did we have to land here?" she asked herself, rubbing her face against the side of the cat. It began to purr. A collar around its neck read "Aubrey".

"It'll be okay Setsuna. Harry Potter isn't that bad." Raye consoled, patting her sister on her shoulder.

"But don't you know Raye? Whenever you get put in this dimension you never come out…"

Bunny snorted "That's not true. You're so superstitious Sets'."

"Am not! Whenever I see Cherry she never acts the same. And I haven't seen her brother since he was called to duty."

Raye rolled her eyes "Well you didn't exactly part on the best of terms."

Setsuna let Aubrey out of her arms and stood, smoothing her leather skirt out. "Nah, nothing can make Alex hate me. He's like the guy version of me."

Bunny sighed "I don't know about you guys but if we're going to have to be students at this stupid school, as these letters claim, I'm going to have to get cleaned up. Can we call home for a shower, then talk later?"

Raye and Setsuna nodded "Yeah, you're right. You get Ai to drop us."

Bunny pulled the computer out again then pushed a few buttons. Three doors appeared in the air. One was grey with a flame carved into it. This is the one Bunny went in, carrying her part of the stuff. A white cat followed her in. Another was green with a frying pan carved into it. Setsuna opened the door and walked in with a hand full of stuff and Aubrey. The last door was blue with a fox on it. Raye walked in carrying the rest of the stuff, she was followed by a black cat and a white cat.

The rooms that they walked in were the same room they spent their younger years in. Through their super computer they were able to access the rooms and use their services but where not able to access the rest of their childhood home. The house was actually located in a dimension all to itself, though it was put together by their mother Gwenafar and father Gregory by other dimensions. This place that was not a place is able to be reached by any other dimension without having to cross any other dimensions. Sense their rooms were made just for them, they were always accessible by them.

After the girls had showered and changed into the uniforms they were provided they met back in the forest.

With the pressing of a few buttons their rooms disappeared. The girls stood with their suitcases, moderately modified so they could hold everything without any problems. Setsuna lit up a cigarette, taking a drag. She had brushed her hair out so that it fell past her shoulders without any problem. Earrings still littered her ears as dark blue eye shadow darkened her eyelids. Her tall form looked smart with the mandatory uniform covering it. Needless to say she was not pleased.

Raye held a white cat in her arms. She was also clean, her dark hair shiny. She too had her earrings in, though her tan skin was clean of make-up. She looked less upset about her uniform, though that may be because she was able to find black nail polish to put on.

Bunny's expression was carefully blank. Her hair was straightened as black liner framed her eyes. She almost looked cute in her uniform, though no one would dare say that to her face.

"Well. I suppose we should go meet with the rest of the students." Raye said.

Setsuna exhaled a plume of smoke "I suppose. But I'm not gonna like it."

"I doubt anyone will like it." Bunny pointed out.

Setsuna nodded and smiled "No, I suppose not."

Author: Note time!

1) DPS: Dimensional Positioning System.

2) Yes, Ai is the car. However, Ai is not only the car but also the super computer that acts like a nanny to the girls. She also secretly reports back their actions to their mom (but they don't know that)

3) you may notice that there are some differences in the girl's appearance (mostly Bunny) that is because in certain dimensions their appearance changes. It's like whenever you and I change our hair colour, or style or whatever whenever we go from phase to phase. Only theirs changes automatically. This means that their wild hair is technically their natural hair colour, because dye is not needed. So yes, Bunny's hair is naturally both silver and blue-silver and her eyes are both naturally red and grey. Also Raye's hair is naturally dark blue, black, and red and black. That's just how they are. (Setsuna's hair was once purple… that's when she was an assassin in the 50's… it was awesome)


	2. Changes

The three teenagers stepped out of the Forbidden Forest and stepped onto Hogwarts grounds. That is when the tingling sensation began. "What the hell?" Bunny asked.

Raye's eyes got as wide as saucers "Bunny you got taller!"

"Nu-uh you got shorter Raye-chan!" Setsuna exclaimed, pointing.

"Oh my god so did you!" Raye pointed.

"Crap" was all Bunny said.

"What's going on?" Raye asked.

"Isn't it obvious? We're eleven. The age that you get accepted to Hogwarts." Bunny explained. Her silver hair had been turned to its polar opposite, jet black. It was cut in a bob that ended at her chin, so straight it looked sharp. Her eyes were a grey so light, it looked to be almost white. It would have looked almost scary if it hadn't been for the fact that her skin was whiter. Her height had not altered (being at four foot nine), and she would have looked cute if it weren't for the fact that she looked quite evil.

"But we were never eleven at the same time. Well, except Raye and I for a while." Setsuna said. With her change her hair colour was now a blue-green colour, not unlike sea foam, it was also wavy and trailed far below her waist. Her eyes were still bright blue, but her skin was slightly freckled. She no longer had the body of a seventeen year old, but that of an eleven year old. She was petite, no taller than five foot. She only had her ears pierced once, while her nose had no piercing.

"You know dimensional time doesn't make sense." Raye said. Her raven black hair was pulled back in a pony-tail that ended at her neck. Her dark blue eyes were just that, with no slit of silver. She was five foot two and petite. However, she was pretty muscular for an eleven year old, indicating that she was physically active. Her skin was the same tan it had always been.

"Yeah but still… oh wait a sec. If we all have the same age…" she trailed off.

"HA! You're the youngest!" Raye said, pointing at her sea foam haired sister.

"But you guys are only like… ten days away from each other. We'll have to say you are twins."

"And you're only eight months away from us." Bunny pointed out "Looks like we're triplets."

"HA!" Setsuna said, pointing at Raye "Now no one's the youngest!"

Raye stuck out her tongue.

"Come on you idiots. We don't want to be the only ones stuck out here." Bunny said, walking forward.

Just as they stepped out of the shadow of the forbidden forest, the rest of the students arrived by gondola. They were able to mix in with the crowd fairly easily.

Most of the eleven-year-olds stared up at the ancient castle in aw. The Hellsing sisters of course rolled their eyes at the reaction. Their house was much bigger, and they weren't even spoiled rich kids.

Some of the other students were of course. They were easily able to spot the original characters of the book, including but not limited to, Draco Malfoy.

"Man, why'd such a stud muffin have to be such a sniveling twerp?" Setsuna muttered.

"You know I wondered that myself." said a male voice behind them.

Both Setsuna and Raye jumped, while Bunny just rolled her eyes "Wondering when you would show up Alexander."

"Alex?" Behind them were two figures, relatively similar to Cherry and her twin Alexis…ahem… excuse me, Alex. The difference being that they were a few years older.

Cherry's electric pink hair now had strands of silver running through it. It was cut short, to her chin, and brushed straight. Her green eyes were hidden behind small circular glasses. She was wearing the standard Professor uniform, complete with pointy hat and cloak. Her hat had a cherry pin stuck in it.

Alexander looked almost exactly the same as he did as a student. He had blonde hair that went past his ears, as well as green eyes that mirrored his sister's. His uniform looked like it was made by Gucci or some other big-name designer.

"What the hell?" Setsuna asked the heavens.

"Who knows. One second I was waiting for Author-chan to take up my fic again, the next I was here. Apparently I'm a teacher." Cherry explained thoughtfully.

"that is scary." pointed out Setsuna.

"Yes, yes it is. You guys better go on, Cat-lady's about to talk to you." Cherry instructed.

"Cat-lady?" Raye asked.

"McGonigal." Setsuna explained.

"Oh. Duh."

Author: this took me a while.

Raye: WHY???

Author: cause it took me forever to figure out what you guys looked like. Well… except for Sets. I actually know her whole past. You guys, not so much.

Cherry: enough about them. You don't finish MY story, then you pull me into THEIRS. If this ends badly, or worse yet doesn't end at all, I will kill you personally.

Author: Good luck. Anyway, notes:

1) Yes, I know that so far in every chapter the girls have changed appearance. This'll be the last change I PROMISE. I just had to turn them young. Bunny actually came up with her appearance. Sets is based on an early version of herself, when she was more like Sailor Pluto from Sailor Moon. Raye I made up, cause all Raye wanted to tell me was "She's sporty". I think I did pretty good. There's this whole story in my head about why she doesn't have the silver in her eye. It's all their undiscovered torched past (Raye gets the worst of that).

2) For a while Setsuna was actually short. It's scary. Raye was taller than her. Bunny didn't grow past eleven. I found that funny as all hell.

3) the girls are approximately like 100 years apart (give or take) in human time. However, Setsuna and Raye are closer in age in their own special Hellsing time. This makes calculating age and time difficult. Why did I make it this way? I'm an over-achiever as long as there is no grade or deadline involved.

4) Alexander is ACTUALLY supposed to be the male version of Cherry, but somehow along the way Cherry and Setsuna became mostly interchangeable. The only difference in their personality is Setsuna is more punk and alcoholic, while Cherry is more of a slut.

Cherry: HEY!!!

Author: Can you dispute it?

Cherry: No…

Author: then allow me to continue… This means that Alexander/Cherry/Setsuna share the same taste in men… and women… and most other things (except clothes and alcohol… and pets)

5) Alex always looks good. Even when he's an old man he's gonna look the same.

6) as in my previous works of Harry Potter fan dome. I must warn: I LOVE to make fun of Harry Potter. I'll also include rants. And inside jokes. I usually nickname people. I have only read all of the books once, and I have only watched I think two or three and a half of the movies (I don't even know how many are out) which means I forget most things. I refer to the humongous wikipedia site, as well as other sites I book-marked. I may one day re-read the books, and therefore remember things like what is the name of the Divination teacher and what the dark mark looks like (inside jokes here, they will be mentioned later). I have a step up cause the last (hopefully) book has been published kinda recently so it is sorta fresh in my mind. Lets cross our fingers.


	3. Sorting

Author: Okay, so this might be the last chapter I do until I can find a copy of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. I want to make this as accurate to-the-book-except-for-the-addition-of-the-crazy-demon-thingies-and-Cherry-and-Alexis-cough-Alex. Sooooo… this means I'll fudge the hat seen, but after that I'll have to find the book so I know exactly what goes on. So enjoy whilst you can.

* * *

The little eleven year olds were ushered into the over-glammed dining hall. Everyone stared in aw, acting as if they'd never seen a room that has a roof that looks exactly like the sky they saw mere moments ago. Damn yokels. At the front of the room was a podium where all of the teachers sat (sans cat-lady, Cherry and her brother, the last of the two were currently taking their seats). The rest of the room was taken up by huge tables stacked with various degrees of teenaged children. In the space separating teachers from students sat a stool with an over patched hat that looked like it had seen the wrong end of a garbage can one two many times.

An old man with a Gandolph-worthy beard stood. He was introduced as the headmaster, named Dumbledor. "Funny, he doesn't look anything like a Bumblebee." Setsuna whispered. When her sisters just stared at her she smiled sheepishly "Never mind."

After much ado about nothing, they began calling names for the hat. There was more ado about nothing as people cheered as the hat assigned houses. There was many patting on the back and hugging.

Finally, when it came time for the girl's turn, Dumbledor called out "Hellsing, Bunny."

"What kind of name is Bunny Hellsing?" Draco sneered from across the room.

The hat barely touched the top of Bunny's head before it yelled "Slytherin!"

Bunny smirked as she headed to the appointed table. She forced a couple to part as she sat right in front of Draco. He gulped as he saw the fire in her eyes.

"I'm sure we'll be best of friends, Draco was it?"

Draco pulled himself together enough to look away and ignore her.

"I wonder how well this Dragon deals with fire." Setsuna murmured as Raye giggled.

"Hellsing, Raye."

Raye skipped up to the hat and sat down on the stool, smoothing her skirt as she went. The hat sat on her head for long enough to get past the implications of foxes on broomsticks before saying "Griffindor"

"Fuck." Setsuna cursed. She knew there was no way she could get into Griffindor, so her only chance was Slytherin.

Raye absently sat at an empty spot, trying to figure out how she would get to see her sisters.

"Hellsing, Setsuna."

Setsuna marched to the firing squad, sitting down in a flurry. When she felt the hat placed on her hand she started whispering "Slytherin, Slytherin, Slytherin,"

"Ravenclaw!"

Setsuna fell off her seat "Excuse me?? I said Slytherin you stupid excuse for a dunce cap!" She expressed her anger by pummeling the 'stupid excuse for a dunce cap'.

"40 points from Ravenclaw!" Minerva McGonagall yelled.

That failed to cease Setsuna's ministrations. She finally had to be dragged off by two prefects, cursing the entire way.

"If you don't shut up you're probably going to get beaten by half the school." One prefect whispered in her ear.

"They can try." she growled, although she quietly took her seat.

The rest of the night passed uneventfully, until of course Harry took the stand. Everyone made noise over his arrival.

After the last of the names had been called they began the meal. Many chatted, more ate. Raye became engaged in conversation by a girl with long brown hair pulled back in a loose half ponytail and a girl of African decent with long black hair pulled back into a braid. They introduced themselves as Katie Bell and Angelia Johnson, and proceeded to tell Raye about the wonders of Quidditch.

"I know how hard it is to be separated from your twin." A Indian girl with long black hair said to Setsuna "I'm Padma Patil, my sister's in Griffindor like yours."

"Oh?" Setsuna said, without much interest.

Any attempt at conversation with Bunny was silenced, if there even was one.

* * *

Author: Wikipedia has yet again saved my ass! Everybody worship it! Sorry the chapter was so short, i would have been able to put more in it (and maybe will later) if i had my book. 


End file.
